[ It's true - he had. He wants to say more, the details of the day already bubbling in his head and his burning chest even though they haven't made their way into his mouth yet, but he just can't tell her. Not yet. Because she'll be gentle about it and understanding because it's him, and he doesn't know if forgiving himself is something he can fight right now.
He also doesn't want to find out if her understanding and forgiveness still mean the same thing to him as they once had.
But when she moves to get up, the instinct for easy physicality that he's been experiencing all day kicks into gear and he lets his head fall onto her shoulder so she'll have to actively dislodge him in order to get up.
He doesn't know what he wants from her, or if any words will work. He just doesn't want her to give him space. That's never helped him before and something in him, both real and dosed, is missing human connection now. ]
no subject
He also doesn't want to find out if her understanding and forgiveness still mean the same thing to him as they once had.
But when she moves to get up, the instinct for easy physicality that he's been experiencing all day kicks into gear and he lets his head fall onto her shoulder so she'll have to actively dislodge him in order to get up.
He doesn't know what he wants from her, or if any words will work. He just doesn't want her to give him space. That's never helped him before and something in him, both real and dosed, is missing human connection now. ]