[The relief was intense and immediate. Steve lifted his free arm and grabbed the back of James' head, fingers curling in the short hair as he brought his mouth down. They were already pressed chest-to-chest and the distance for a kiss was negligible. Steve just wanted to make sure James didn't get away before he was done. It was a hard, demanding kiss and he shoved his tongue past James' teeth to taste the liquor the man had been drinking on his tongue.

When Steve finally lifted his head enough to breathe, his voice was rough and strained, mumbling against James' mouth.]


Said I wouldn't do that again already. It was me who saved you. I bought you, I nursed you, I held you. You were mine. Mine. And suddenly he was just there. In my bed. I didn't act well but I wasn't expecting it. I'm sorry. Just don't do that again and I can keep my cool. I know you love him, that he's at least as special as me, I just . . . it hurts looking at it. I want you to have him James, all of him. I just don't wanna be taunted with it or anything. I swear, see him all you want, whatever makes you happy. Just don't make me share, please. I can't handle it.


[By the end his voice was a broken whisper. He could live with anything James wanted to do with other people, especially Jim, as long as he didn't have to see it. If it was in front of his face, he couldn't help the way it ate at him, goading him to do something. To take the man back somehow. It wasn't rational, it was a primitive part of Steve that couldn't be reasoned with, so he tried to avoid situations that awoke the beast. That was all he asked for, just not to be put in those situations.

He met James' eyes, his own dark with emotion.]


Just don't make me watch you with someone else, that's all I ask. Do whatever makes you happy, but don't make me watch.